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Author Topic: Nicholas Lim [Fallen Grace & Redemption]  (Read 113 times)

Offline greentara

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Nicholas Lim [Fallen Grace & Redemption]
« on: April 26, 2019, 09:01:36 PM »
'I did what I did': NUS student Nicholas Lim breaks silence on peeping Tom scandal
Kimberly Foo | Apr 26, 2019

The man at the centre of the peeping Tom scandal that rocked the nation has finally broken his silence.

The National University of Singapore (NUS) undergraduate, identified as Nicholas Lim, was said to be the offender who was caught filming fellow student Monica Baey while she was showering in a hostel toilet.

Amid overwhelming support for Baey after she shared her ordeal and named Lim on social media on April 19, he gave an exclusive interview to The Straits Times, saying that he doesn't think of himself as a "victim".

"I'm the perpetrator. I did what I did," he said.

In the series of Instagram Stories, Baey shared how NUS and the police failed to mete out adequate sanctions to the peeping Tom.

Her case sparked outrage with Education Minister Ong Ye Kung calling NUS' penalties "manifestly inadequate".

While Baey received the bulk of the media attention the past few days, Lim had kept quiet about the scandal but he is speaking up now because he wants people to know "how truly sorry I am".

CONFESSED TO FILMING

Lim insisted that he did not know what came over him that night of the incident. He was at Eusoff Hall after celebrating a touch rugby match with his teammates when he decided to act on his impulses.

"The thought came and I did what I did. It was a hasty decision. I didn't know who was inside. I wasn't dead drunk," Lim revealed.

Shortly after, his girlfriend, who is also a student of NUS, received word about a peeping Tom preying on girls around campus.

It was then he confessed to her that he had filmed her friend Baey.

The couple arranged to meet up with Baey to own up to his actions as well as seek for her forgiveness.

He reiterated that he did not confess out of fear, but wanted to come clean and not run away from his actions.

FAMILY UNDER SCRUTINY

As Baey's story started to spread like wildfire, it brought along intense media coverage on Lim as the public speculated about his background.

He described feeling worried and scared after seeing the posts go viral and decided to inform his father, a taxi driver, and his mother, who is a housewife.

Coincidentally, his grandmother passed away from a heart attack the next day, but he clarified that the death was not related to the scandal.

With two heartbreaking situations that his parents had to face, Lim said that it was painful to see them still worrying about him even as they prepared for the funeral.

"As a son, the last thing I want is for them to be so worried about me at their age, when I should be the one taking care of them," said Lim.

"I SEEK EVERYONE'S FORGIVENESS"

The backlash also cost Lim his financial advisor job when his company, Great Eastern Singapore, suspended him after his dirty deed was made public. He has since resigned from the position.

When asked if he felt that his punishment of a conditional warning and a suspension of one semester was too weak, he replied that he is in no position to judge.

"I hope that people realise the power and impact of social media, and use it for the good of the society. That being said, I am in no position to claim what is fair or not, nor right or wrong.

"I personally hope that nobody else, along with their loved ones, would have to go through the scrutiny and shaming we did. I would not wish that upon my worst enemy."

He also took the opportunity to seek forgiveness from the public.

"Nobody should ever be put through the kind of trauma that I caused Monica. People have condemned me and my actions - I deserve it.

"I condemn myself. I seek everyone's forgiveness," he said.

Meanwhile, NUS held their first townhall on April 25 where they admitted they had failed Monica Baey and would work on setting up a victim support unit and improving campus security.

Source: https://www.asiaone.com/singapore/i-did-what-i-did-nus-student-nicholas-lim-breaks-silence-peeping-tom-scandal

Offline greentara

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Re: Nicholas Lim [Fallen Grace & Redemption]
« Reply #1 on: April 26, 2019, 09:02:58 PM »

Offline greentara

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Re: Nicholas Lim [Fallen Grace & Redemption]
« Reply #2 on: May 03, 2019, 12:42:35 PM »
NUS Peeping Tom case: Monica Baey urges online bullying against Nicholas Lim to stop
Ms Monica Baey said after all that has happened, what she wants to achieve is to set a precedent for such cases in the future, where girls who find themselves in her shoes down the road can feel acknowledged and confident they will be treated fairly.
NG HUIWEN | THE STRAITS TIMES  May 02, 2019

SINGAPORE - Nearly two weeks since Instagram stories she posted took on a life of their own, National University of Singapore (NUS) undergraduate Monica Baey has again took to the social media platform to call for the online harassment against her perpetrator to stop.

In an Instagram post on Wednesday (May 1) titled "closure", Ms Baey noted that change at the university is afoot, but also spoke out against those who disagreed with the way she shared her story as a victim of sexual assault.

On April 18, the 23-year-old had expressed her frustration that NUS had not done more against fellow student Nicholas Lim, who filmed her in the shower at Eusoff Hall last November.

Mr Lim was given a 12-month conditional warning from police and was suspended from school for a semester. He was also made to write an apology letter to her.

The Instagram stories, which revealed Mr Lim's name and personal details, quickly went viral and prompted the university to form a review committee to take a closer look at disciplinary and support frameworks.

It also organised a campus town hall meeting attended by more than 600 students, including Ms Baey, who flew back to Singapore from her exchange programme in Taiwan.

NUS president Tan Eng Chye later apologised for falling short in providing support to victims of sexual misconduct, while Education Minister Ong Ye Kung called the current penalties "manifestly inadequate".

Describing it as "incredibly tiring, yet probably the most fulfilling week of my life", Ms Baey said on Wednesday that she is glad that "change has finally come".

However, she noted that Mr Lim did not deserve to be bullied online for what he had done.

She also acknowledged that it was "fair" for some people to disagree with how she had brought the issue to light.

She wrote: "To address those who are saying that my perpetrator is now a victim, all I will say in response to that is I genuinely hope that he is receiving proper support he needs to rehabilitate, and the unnecessary online harassment toward him and his loved ones will stop."

Though she felt that Mr Lim had got away lightly, she added it would now be up to NUS and its review committee - not Internet users or even herself - to make the call on whether her case should be reopened and tougher punishments should be meted out.

"I think it is time to step away from the discussion of what people think should be done to him, and step into the discussion of how we can improve our current society," she wrote.

"I want to say that I have been and still am truly sorry for what I have done. Nobody should ever be put through the kind of trauma that I caused Monica. People have condemned me and my actions - I deserve it. I condemn myself. I seek everyone's forgiveness."

In her Instagram post, Ms Baey also opened up about her feelings of paranoia, confusion and disgust even months after the filming incident.

"The paranoia never goes away. This nagging feeling at the back of your mind, telling you that you are never safe," she wrote.

"I get so frustrated that I break down in the shower sometimes because I'm so tired of worrying. I wasn't even touched by him and yet I feel like my entire body has been violated. The feeling of disgust still sits inside of me," she added.

Ms Baey ended her lengthy Instagram post by urging other victims of voyeurism to be courageous in speaking out.

She also expressed her hopes that society would be able to do more to protect victims and their reputation.

"I hope that the conversation on whether enough is being done to prevent sexual assault will continue," she wrote.

"I hope that Singapore has reflected on what has happened, why this blew up as big as it did, and learn to not avoid issues but rather face the hard reality - sexual misconduct and assault is much more prevalent that it appears to be," she added.

Source: https://www.asiaone.com/singapore/nus-peeping-tom-case-monica-baey-urges-online-bullying-against-nicholas-lim-stop